Picking the Perfect Surprise Engagement Ring

Three yellow gold, rose cut engagement rings sit up on a light background with shadows.

Picking out the perfect engagement ring can be tough. I get it. I picked out my own engagement ring, and it still took me months to decide what I wanted to wear as a symbol of my relationship for the rest of my life. So if your partner wants their engagement ring to be a surprise, I’d understand if you’re feeling a lot of pressure to get it right. 

Here’s the good news: Hera & Gaia is here to help! This guide will walk you through the questions you should consider when you’re picking out a surprise engagement ring for your partner. We can also help you brainstorm during a complimentary virtual consultation, so book today!

Getting Started

Start off by thinking about your partner’s taste, including their existing jewelry and any conversations you may have had about a future engagement ring. You probably have a more intuitive sense of their style than you realize - you’re getting married, after all, so you know each other well! 

Let’s get started. How do you think they’d answer these questions about their ring? 

Big stone or something more understated? 

White, rose or yellow gold? 

Contemporary, classic or antique-inspired? 

If you aren’t quite sure, reach out to your partner’s family and friends for direction. In our experience, our clients usually talk to their mom or their best friend, for instance, about what kind of engagement ring they’d like. If your partner has Instagram or Pinterest, check there as well - they might have saved some inspiration photos or commented on others’ engagement ring posts.

Refining Ideas

Next up, let’s get practical. Does your partner have any lifestyle constraints we should think about? Here are some common ones: 

Wears gloves at work - needs a low-profile engagement ring

Works with their hands - needs an engagement ring that’s easy to clean

Loves to hike - needs their ring to be sturdy and comfortable


Once you know more about what your partner is looking for, check out our guide to Choosing an Engagement Ring, Step by Step. We walk through all the main decision points when choosing an engagement ring, so you don’t overlook any details.

Sneaking the Ring Size

Last but not least is ring size, which can be tricky to get without blowing your cover. The most reliable estimate will be if they have other rings they wear on their left ring finger, but any ring will do. Just note which finger and hand they wear them on, and we can help you estimate. Always err on the side of ordering slightly larger rather than smaller - rings are easier to size down than up.

To measure an existing ring, measure the inside millimeter diameter as pictured here and then match it to the chart below to find the size. 

If your partner doesn’t wear rings, a close friend or family member might know their size or have a guess based on their own hands. As a last choice, we can also take a look at a photo of your partner’s hands and make a guess. 

Still not Sure?

If you still aren’t sure about your choice, don’t worry! We can help you figure it out. Book a complimentary virtual consultation today.

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